Tuesday, February 12, 2008

repeating myself

it seems to be my *mode* these days.

I do it at home - with the children.
With the husband.

I do it with everysingleeffindoctor I see.

at church, in the grocery store, on the play ground, at the committee meeting .... the list goes on.

it isn't as if my story changes.

I mean the repeating with the children is one thing -- I said no. Stop touching your sister. Do not; climb on that, cut that, throw that, bounce that, eat that .... yada, yada, yada.

Mr. Farmer ... well, you know -- I repeat a lot -- we won't even get into it here.

The other stuff has to do with the health though. and the weight. and some life changes.

The Doctors. They piss me off. I am so tired of repeating my story. My history. Come on. If I have to show up a half an hour early, fill out a 20 page form, sign all of my privary rights away -- shouldn't they take the time to read my effin' charts? I actually told my PCP this last week ... and warned him that I will walk out on the next *specialist* who asks me to tell my story.

and people (good people) are concerned. I get it. But I feel like I should just run an ad, explaining it all so that I don't have to say it over and over ... I forget who I have told what ... it doesn't help that the medications all seem to cause some sort of memory loss ... in fact even as I type this, I wonder if I have already posted all of this ... hmmm.

Wishing you the best ..


“I've never tried to block out the memories of the past, even though some are painful. I don't understand people who hide from their past. Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now.”
Sophia Loren

Be appalled at this, O heavens, and shudder with great horror," declares the LORD. "My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water.
Jeremiah 2:12-13